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*A newsreport nailed to a tree*

- - - - - nailed newsreport tree

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3 replies to this topic

#1
Declan O'Connor

Declan O'Connor

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YEW CRUSHES BRITAIN IN A PRESEASON FRIENDLY!!

Last night saw the first friendly bagball match between the Yewish and Britain teams. The season is due to begin in the coming weeks, and if the Yewish team keeps up this rampant attitude the season might be over already! The team from Yew; Captain Dart, Sergeant Wilkes, Corporal Walker and the famous hobbit Daelia from the Yewish Militia and The King's Deer Tavern were completely rampant in the match last night. They thrashed the Britons seven goals to none. A fantastic performance from the whole team, Dart and Daelia scoring some fantastic goals while Wilkes and Walker played a inpenitrable defensive game. The Britain team knew they had been well beated, their Baron Edmund, Commander Esmeralda and two other 'unknowns' were invited to Yew to the Tavern to have a after-match drink, however it is rumoured that their commander was the only one to turn up.
An onlooker was heard saying that it was the best display of raw talent he had seen in a bagball game for years, and that the team were a credit to Yew.


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COME ON YOU YEWWW!

Watch this space!



#2
Declan O'Connor

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YEW THRASH VESPER 8-1!!



Last night Yew proved that their game against Britain was no fluke! Yew trounced Vesper in an over convincing 8-1 win in Britain!! thats 17 Goals in just two Matches now!

Reported by Aiden Margera (impartial referee)

At 8pm the lads arrived in StoneKeep, Sporting their Kits. We spoke about the forcoming game and discussed afew tactics before setting off to Badlands Britain and to the bagball pitch. We discussed a victory song en route which was to be.. "Your Shite! and Yew Know You Are!!". A good choice i reckon.
On reaching the pitch, our opposition was yet to arrive so we decided to have a little two on two game to "warm up". Only afew minutes passed untill Vesper arrived and what a shabby bunch they looked. Sporting nothing other than there kilts and boots our first impressions werent great.

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I stopped the lads from practising and set to work discussing the rules. 10 Minutes each way, no running with the ball, The ball MUST be placed on the line, then over it for a goal to stand and no Violence. Once that was clear, I got them ready and dropped the ball on the kick off spot, Blowing my whistle! - It was under way!

The first half proved to be an entertaining half, well on our behalf anyways. a fantastic FIVE goals were put past the Vesperian defence! A truely great display! Radek and Bladius netting two each, and Sineal getting a late one respectively. On the ten minute mark i blew my whistle for half time! Vesper were far from happy about their performance, and rightly so!

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I had a quick word with the lads, telling them to keep there heads and at the same time trounch the beggers! then had the teams swap sides. I blew me whistle once they were ready and the second half was underway!.
Vesper seemed to have a little more "bite" in their play this half, reaching our goalline four times!!. Twice Bladius made some fantastic Goal line clearences! and showed some amazing dribbling skills to get the ball away from our area. Radek made a good clearence too! but we fell asleep at the back in the end and conceded a sloppy goal. NEVERTHELESS! we pressed on! picking our heads up we began to dominate once again, Bagging another three goals this half. Radek getting his hatrick, Longshot getting on the scoresheet and Sineal Finishing it off.

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On the ten minute mark, I blew my whistle and that was it! Another Fantastic display by Yew! and another win! Great stuff lads! well played.

For the record, here are the scorers -

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#3
Declan O'Connor

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YEW DEMOLISH COVE 12-0 AS RUN CONTINUES!



Reported by Aiden Margera (impartial refereee)

Tonight saw the Guardsmen Milita Bagball team face Cove. With their last victory a commanding one, everyone was expecting the Guardsmen to triumph. Locals were predicting a 6-1 trashing.. OH.. how different it was..

We had originally hoped to hold the match at Luna, but that went abit pair-shaped as there was a taint there shouting lord knows what. So we decided to play at Britain in the badlands again. This is proving to be our adopted home ground it seems.. well untill i get some planning permission to create our own ground. Anyways..

The lads had started warming up as i arrived with cove yet to appear. I watched them for afew moments, taking notes and thinking about tactics then Cove arrived. I told them the rules, and they apparently play by the same ones so that was all good. That done, We kicked off.

The first half was a complete disaster for Cove. It ended six nill with Radek bagging a hatrick. We completely battered them in the first half, scoring a goal in all but two of the ten minutes! As said before, Radek bagged three, With Sineal, Daelia and Tim scoring one each repsectivley. Coming to the half time whistle, Cove looked demoralised and fed up. I blew for half time and let them gather themselves and pick themselves up.

The second half turned out to be just as the same. Yew Battered them in all fairness! Radek bagging another FOUR Goals bringing his tally to an incredible seven for the match! One of the Cove players was sent to the sinbin for one minute after a mad challange on Sineal. Whilst Cove were a man down Sineal and Daelia finished them off with another goal a peice!


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Well done to Yew! Can anybody Stop us!?
(Can they ****!!)

#4
Escaflowne/Balgus

Escaflowne/Balgus

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*Cuts down the tree*
(Aimbots)

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