| Lady and Supreme being of the rolling pins!
Join Date: Mar 2005 Shard: Sonoma
Posts: 2,809
Thanks: 19
Thanked 23 Times in 8 Posts
My Mood:  | [News] Yew Merry Center for All Story Night!
Good Times at the YMCA ... Original article for Ultima Online Stratics by Kimi-Mori (Sonoma News Manager) as posted on UO Stratics Sonoma Shard Forum
The original news link was submitted to UOForums by: Zita Quote: From the headache that Theresa is nursing this morning they had a roaring time at the Yew Merry Center for All last night. After questioning Theresa I can understand from the dirty ditties that came from her why she drank so much. The list of story tellers are Theresa THB, Wrath, Nexus, Forsythe [YMCA owner] and Jayde [UOS ].
Theresa: Something I found during me Pub crawling, It is called;
The Widow and the Devil
 High atop a lonely moor, a Widow lived alone. Well, in she kept, and as she slept, her pillow heard her moan: "Oh, many's the lonely traveller has spent the night with me, but there's no a man in all creation gives content to me! "Well, some can manage once or twice, and some make three or four; but it seems to me a rarity is the man who can do more. I'd do anything to find him, in Heaven or in Hell." And as she spoke these words, sure, she heard her front door bell.
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
So boldly ran the Widow, and the door did open wide, and as she did, a tall and handsome stranger stepped inside. Well, she gave him bread and brandy, and when that he was fed, he said, "My dear, now have no fear; it's time to come to bed. "For I've heard your plea right down the lane, and I've come to see you right. But you must come to Hell with me if I can last the night." Well, she said, "You randy Devil! To this bargain I'll agree, for Hell on Earth, or Hell in Hell, it's all the same to me!"
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
Now, as they tumbled into bed, the Devil, he proved well... and he thought before the night would end that she'd be in his Hell. Ah, but when they came to number nine, the Widow cried out, "More!" And when the twelfth time came around, the Widow cried, "Encore!" At twenty-five the Devil felt compelled to take a rest, but the Widow cried, "Come raise your head, and put me to the test!" At sixty-nine, the Widow laughed. "Again! Again!" she cried, and the Devil said, "Well, I can see just how your husband died!"
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
At ninety-nine, the Devil he began to wail and weep. He said, "I'll give you anything, if you'll let me go to sleep!" But before the morning light was up, the Devil hobbled home, and the Widow, still not satisfied, once more was left alone. She lay there on her pillow and she thought on ninety-nine. "It's a pity that poor old Devil couldn't manage one more time! I'll call him up again tonight to see what can be done - with a little more application, he could've made the Ton !"
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
But when she called to him that night, no Devil did appear. For the first time in Eternity, the Devil, he shook with fear. He said, "Of all the torments I've witnessed here in Hell, I never knew what pain was, 'til I rang your front door bell!"
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
And the wind blew cold and lonely across that Widow's moor, and she never, ever turned away a traveller from the door.
Terrance of Napa: *bows his head to all* I bring this poem to you from my home shard, in hopes that it finds new ears.....
"The Common King"
Long ago and far from here,
From cross the stars and time,
Came a man of just nature,
Bearing an amulet that did shine.
His name was British,
And he was neither greedy nor vain,
And answering all our wish,
He slew the vile Mondain.
We rejoiced and we cheered,
And we made him our King,
He established peace among men,
And of him I do sing.
But shortly, he left us,
And went we know not where,
Some of us were angry, and upset,
As he seemingly vanished into thin air.
But I know the secret,
And this I will say,
For what brought him to us,
Did again take him away...
And for the stars he did depart,
But I know the secret,
And this I will say,
For what brought him to us,
Did again take him away...
For from the stars he came,
And for the stars he did depart,
But before leaving, his knowledge & wisdom,
He did impart.
"Think not of me as gone" he said,
Then pointed to the sky,
At a single, bright star,
That would catch every eye.
"Look for me there,"
"That single, bright point of light."
"And let the Virtues guide you,"
"Knowing I watch over you, day and night."
So for years upon years,
I have looked to the sky,
For the King we all love,
And whose Virtues, we hold high.....
Theresa: Another I found at the Pubs;
A Prudent Thief.
A prudent thief should never drink so much that he becomes bold. Because a thief who boasts and brags will rarely live to grow old. For silence is a thief's best bet and if he breaks this etiquette. Undoubtedly what he will get...will be more trouble than gold. Consider Zhele a thief from Greel, who drank at the Swan and Grouse. He made himself quite popular by buying rounds for the house. One night in drunken revelry, he made a bet with prideful glee, but later on he would agree...he never should've been soused. A thief's best friends are luck and speed, alertness, cunning and stealth. And ale can cause these all to flee and cheat a thief of his wealth. But add to this a drunken dare to steal a lock of the Empress' hair, then even a fool should be aware...this may be bad for your health.
So Zhele did stumble through the door in his most fearless state. He slipped in shadows past the guard and snuck through the palace gate. Then giggling he scaled the wall so drunk he thought he could not fall. For wasn't he the best of all...and surely favored by Fate. As he climbed in he saw a girl who was dressed in cloth not fur. A palace maid? Perhaps a cook? T'was difficult to be sure. A homely lass she did appear, but anyone looks good through beer, So when she asked, "Why are you here?"...he said he was there for her. He showered her with compliments for flattery was his skill. And so they spent a pleasant time as any young couple will. But as the dawn lit their embrace, he recognized the lady's face from every golden coin it graced...and suddenly he felt ill. He'd heard that drink was dangerous and now he knew for a fact. For theives caught in the palace were hanged or stretched upon a rack. But as this thief was kind and bold, the empress gifted him with gold. (Then the guard made sure that he'd been told... he'd be killed if he ever came back.)
And so he was a thief no more for that was part of the deal. His bet was lost because she gave him what he went there to steal. So other thieves may scorn and mock his name and tale but still they flock For a drink and a look at the Empresses Lock... the finest tavern in Greel.
Nexus:
Charlie Mops
 A long time ago way back in history when there was nothing to drink, except for cups of tea, along came a brilliant man by the name of Charlie Mops and he had him a special brew and he made it out of hops the drunken Rat, at the Fifeand Drum O'Rourke's down in the dell, one thing you can count on, it's Charlie's beer they sell.
So all ye lads and lasses at eleven o'clock yte stop and take five short seconds to remember charlie mops A bucket of malt, a bushel of hops you stir it around with a stick the kind of lubrication that makes me engine tick!!
Forty pints of ale a day will keep away the quacks and it only costs a ha'penny and one in six in tax! Well, he must have been an Admiral, a Sultan or a King and to his prases we shall always sing! Look at what he did for us, he filled us up with cheer. God bless Ol' Charlie Mops. The man who invented Beer!
Forsythe:
The Puzzle!
 Perhaps I can take a moment of all your time! Tis not quite a story, but maybe someone could help me find what I am searching for. I don't really have much time. As this jug of cider requires a lot of attention.
Very well! Perhaps someone could help me find what I am searching for as of late. *places a jug of cider near the wall* Interestingly enough, I never had what I am looking for in my possession. Tis a long story, but I must make it short. I must continue my conversation with cider, momentarily. *hastily removes a few small blocks of wood from his robe* *places them randomly on the floor* This is a puzzle that was given to me quite a few years ago. Each cube of wood has a small section of a map upon it. The problem is, every direction you place the cubes, the map seems to look just right. *assembles the blocks randomly* See, now, I've gone there. *points to a map that looks somewhat like Skara Brae* In fact, I've ended up all over the realm just by moving the blocks around.
I'm not quite sure how many combinations there are. But each side has a perfectly etched piece of the map. Or, maps, I have no idea. Has anyone seen blocks of wood like this before? [No one that night had ever seen such blocks before] *stacks them in a row* They would probably make a great gift to someone you dislike. As I have found them to be one of my most annoying possessions.
The important thing is this map leads to a place where I can find what I am looking for. Buried somewhere in Felucca is a small yellow box. *holds out his arms* About that size. Inside this box is an item that is not commonly found in our current age. Tis called a Wrangler's Vest. Though I am a mage at heart, this specific item can be a wonderous tool in the wilds. By wearing a Wrangler's Vest, all creatures, both aggressive and kind will be drawn toward you. For quite a distance, in all directions.
In the proper hands, a Wrangler's Vest can defeat your enemies. Or provide you with the animals you are hunting for. Unfortunately, the Wrangler Vests have no effect on a properly trained animal. Although, that would make it an even more exceptionally useful item. *quickly reassembles the blocks in another order* There are... uses for such an item. But one must ponder upon what that use could be. There are uses that a mage could use such an item for. The problem is, finding the location of the buried box is seemingly a task beyond measure. It is something I have long searched for and have only seen but once.
Dor: The puzzle consists of how many pieces? Forsythe: There are 8 blocks, each with four sides. Each etched with a seemingly borderless map. I am a mage, I don't like numbers as much as I should. I seem to keep finding new combinations.
There is only one other piece of this puzzle that eludes my knowledge. And that is a shape of a triangle. Hector Firebrand: That means north. Forsythe: Perhaps it does. Dor: It does?! Forsythe: But, so far, I figure it means that whatever map is created, must match a shape of a triangle. Terrance of Napa: Eight pieces...and a triangle? Forsythe: Which, perhaps, matches our existing cartography. Jayde: The eight Virtues. Terrance of Napa: The Codex Dor: *rummages in her pack for a world map* Forsythe: Both very good ideas. Terrance of Napa: The triangle could represent the Three Principles Forsythe: Oddly enough, I have not considered either of those possibilities. Jayde: Eight Virtues... three Principles
Forsythe: ... I was thinking of it in a more physical triangle combined with a map. But the Virtues, Principles, hmm. Yule B Sori: (blocks have 6 sides btw) Forsythe: Not all sides are etched, Yule. Interesting. each Virtue has its own symbol, no?
Jayde: It does. Terrance of Napa: *nods again* Forsythe: I'm just thinking out loud now, but, what if each blank part of the blocks would coincide... With a symbol of two virtues in which at least one was located on a portion of a map? Or a map consisting of part of a path between the two? And, if so, perhaps each block has a block that it should be combined with. Jayde: Could be either the Shrines... or the Ilshenar gates? Forsythe: ... Your insights are much appreciated. *slowly collects each block of wood* *grabs his cider from the floor* I am quite exhausted from all this drinking. Terrance of Napa: Tis a most interesting subject.... Forsythe: I must bid thee farewell this evening, everyone. I will speak with thee soon, Dor!
Jayde:
Four Dragons'
One day, now many ages past, saw four young dragons meet. The spring flowers were blooming then; the air was clean and sweet. They got to know each other in the coming days and weeks, and built eternal friendship up between the mouintain-peaks. They shared each other's joys and prides, all hurt when one was pained. They shared a cave and huddled near for comfort when it rained. They shared each other's familities and food and tears and mirth; until one day Fate scattered them across the youthful Earth. One went to lead batallions and excelled at Ares' game; his crest a golden broadsword wreathed within a ring of flame. Those in his charge had faith in him and took his orders well, for when he held his banner high, they'd follow him to Hell.
One dragon climed the mountain-top and sat in contemplation as wild lands turned to towns and towns to states and states to nations. The green dragon of earth and wood became infinitely wise as countless lives of man and beast unfolded 'ere his eyes. One dragon left the other three and journeyed to the east and there he learned to tell great tales and prepare wonderous feasts. Great joy this dragon found about the oriental sea, and while the others toiled and thought, he learned to live care-free.
The fourth and final dragon went not anywhere at all; instead he fortified their home behind a massive wall. He guarded against enemies whose ranks might one day form, and hid his silver wings from view within a thunderstorm. One day centuries later, those four dragons met again in a hidden old oak grove within a lazy forest glen. They laughed and cried and all embraced, and ate and danced and sang, and wrestled playfully with claw and wing and tail and fang. Years they spent among those trees, those reptilian four; they each had seen their share of sadness, fear, despair and war. But for once in a thousand years, everything was just fine - for gone was all but friendship in that glen of oak and pine.
Their roles they finally understood as time defined their places, although the years had changed their names, their bodies and their faces. The four had become guardians, keepers of wind and fire, of meadow and of ocean wave, of storm and mountain spire. They separated once again to take their posts with pride, but people feared the dragons now; their scales they had to hide. In secrecy they kept their watch, in silence kept their vigil, their friendship was their common bond, the dragon-scale their sigil. Still now the four maintain this world, though most will never know, shepherds of their eternal flock which shall not cease to grow. But every time they get a chance, the four return again to reconcile their brotherhood within that forest glen.
Wrath: I have more of a memory than a tale to share.
A Memory
 Many of you may not know who I am. My name is Wrath, and formally William Corwin. This memory I tell you is not of my own, but of someone that I am aquainted with. His name is MKA, silly name I know (I always teased him for it). Twas many years ago, more than I can count. In a town you all are most likely familiar with.....the name is Oasis. Sadly many of the houses in that town are gone, and tis over run by evil... I swear I did not mean to bring them home with me!
Anyway, I digress.....If anyone does not know the history of Oasis, it was founded by a few souls...and this memory tells about a wedding my friend, MKA, was guarding...Wearing his yellow and red guard uniform, he was still a young lad... only a measly 10 years of age.. He was honored that one of the founders had asked him to guard the wedding...that founder name was Jonas. Jonas was a great man, one of those men you could not help to like. The wedding could not have been in a more beautiful, but confusing place. The Hedge Maze.....I must say, MKA had told me of his troubles to get to the middle....that lad sure needed some serious help! Wrath: The wedding was all it could be! There were gods there....I believe one was named GoatBoy (another silly name if you ask me!) There were those in blue robes, and those in green....neither talked to MKA though. Guarding the wedding, as I have been told, was a cinch! With the gods there, there was no reason for fighting!
After the wedding, the party headed back to Oasis Tavern. Kralen Pendragon was behind the bar, while others helped serve the food! What a grand party we all had! With gods joining, as well as blue and green robed figures! MKA was unable to tell me what else happened, he was not a very good guard that eve however, Kralen had been slipping him ale! So after the party is kind of a blur for him! But that, is my memory for this eve.... I apologize if I bored anyone.
Thus ends another evening at the YMCA. Theresa had to trust her mount to see the way home, lucky for her, it knew the way.
| Original article here - http://boards.stratics.com/php-bin/u...v=#Post6424147
Last edited by Queen Mum; 09-02-2006 at 12:16 PM.
|
04-02-2006, 03:25 PM
Similar Threads 
![[News] Yew Merry Center for All Story Night!](http://www.uoforums.com/iconimages/f814/news-yew-merry-center-all-story-night_ltr.gif)
Queen Mum
