What My Mother Taught Me ...

**Queen Mum** · 6th April 2006, 04:50 PM

What My Mother Taught Me

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside -- I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why!"

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times -- don't exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Better Preaching Through Intimidation' ]

.

Ly-Las · 6th April 2006, 11:52 PM

:grin: :grin: :grin: Very good!

**Tabbitha** · 7th April 2006, 02:42 AM

That made me chuckle Queen Mum *grins*

**Adri** · 7th April 2006, 07:43 AM

lol cute

6th April 2006, 04:50 PM	#1
Queen Mum Lead Administrator Join Date: Mar 2005 Shard: Sonoma Posts: 3,063 Gold: 22,127 My Mood: Blog Entries: 20 Thanks: 143 Thanked 299 Times in 120 Posts Awards Showcase Total Awards: 2	What My Mother Taught Me ... What My Mother Taught Me My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside -- I just finished cleaning!" My mother taught me RELIGION: "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" My mother taught me LOGIC: "Because I said so, that's why!" My mother taught me FORESIGHT: "Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident." My mother taught me IRONY: "Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about." My mother taught me about OSMOSIS: "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM: "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!" My mother taught me about STAMINA: "You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished." My mother taught me about WEATHER: "It looks as if a tornado swept through your room." My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS: "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?" My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY: "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times -- don't exaggerate!!!" My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE: "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION: "Stop acting like your father!" My mother taught me about ENVY: "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" [ Author Unknown -- from 'Better Preaching Through Intimidation' ] . *** Sonoma Community Coalition * ICQ 168-812-018 *

6th April 2006, 11:52 PM	#2
Ly-Las Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 522 Gold: 15 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: What My Mother Taught Me ... :grin: :grin: :grin: Very good!

7th April 2006, 02:42 AM	#3
Tabbitha Administrator Join Date: Mar 2006 Shard: Europa/Snowbourn Posts: 6,066 Gold: 69,434 Blog Entries: 6 Thanks: 239 Thanked 321 Times in 197 Posts Awards Showcase Total Awards: 1	Re: What My Mother Taught Me ... That made me chuckle Queen Mum grins

7th April 2006, 07:43 AM	#4
Adri Wearing metal panties in a lightning storm Join Date: May 2004 Shard: Pacific/Landroval Posts: 3,851 Gold: 920 My Mood: Thanks: 210 Thanked 117 Times in 84 Posts Awards Showcase Total Awards: 2	Re: What My Mother Taught Me ... lol cute We are all broken and wounded in this world. Some choose to grow strong at the broken places. --Harold J. Duarte-Bernhardt

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