The following is a partial reproduction of an invitation I received to a
wedding reception; I've also reproduced the spelling and grammatical errors
for the amusement factor.

But, first, a little history. I'm essentially an acquaintance of the bride;
I rarely see her, and I almost never socialize with her. I'm not even a
close enough acquaintance to get invited to the bridal shower. She and her
husband got married about three months ago in a different country; after the
wedding, they traveled in that country for a month.

A few days ago I received an invitation to their wedding reception; the
invitation was printed on tacky (and ugly) laser printer paper. It is being
held at the home of one of the bride's friends.

Here's the invite (keep in mind I reproduced the spelling, punctuation, and
grammar errors as well the capitalization of "poor"):


What time? Well here is the itinerary:
4 o'clock pm, Wine and Cheese social
6 o'clock pm, Fire up the Barbe!!
Post Dinner: Dessert and Slide Show
Post Slide Show: A good old fashion pissin' session
(beer drinking till the cows
come home)

Menu: We will have a nice selection of California wines and various cheeses.
On the barbe we will have your choice of chicken, sausage, or meat/veggie
burgers. Now this is on a first come first serve basis so no fights. As for
the slide show, by that time we should be in quite the mood to share all
kinds of stories about our month in _______. The beer will be the one and
only Fat Tire from Colorado. If you don't know what Fat Tire is you have to
leave after the slide show.

What to bring: Your love and best wishes for a POOR couple making there way
into this cold and nasty world. No joke gifts. If you would like to bring a
gift, we are registered at Target, and could use gift certificates to Best
Buy and Barnes and Nobel Bookstore.

What to wear: As little as you want.


So that was the reception invitation. As for the business about the couple
being poor, one is a dentist and the other is a doctor. I ought to buy them
a word processing program which has both a spell and grammar checker on it.
For those of you from different parts of the country, Best Buy is essentially
a DVD/CD/Stereo store and Barnes and Noble (yes Noble is the PROPER spelling)
is a bookstore. Target is like a Wal-mart or a K-Mart or a Shop-ko.

Ordinarily, I'm the type of person who would buy a gift and mail it out of
courtesy even if I don't consider myself a friend of the bride or groom. Not
this time.