some funny jokes and yes there clean

**kingtony** · 6th November 2007, 10:57 AM

A strict teacher was lecturing his students on the importance of being wide awake. "I've found the most effective way to start a day," he said, "is to take a cold shower. Then I feel rosy all over."
A bored voice from the back of the class interjected, "Tell us more about Rosie."

A man noticed his co-worker wearing an earring. "I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff," he said.

"It's just an earring," the co-worker replied.

"How long have you been wearing it?" the man asked.

"Well," his co-worker replied, "ever since my wife found it in our bed."

Q: Why are women like pianos?
A: If they're not upright, they're grand

Q: Why are women like pianos?
A: If they're not upright, they're grand

An elderly couple was attending a church service. About halfway through the sermon, the old lady leaned over and said "I just let out a silent fart. What do you think I should do?"
Her husband replied, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

A redneck came to the big city to visit some friends. They went to an Applebee's restaurant for dinner and one of the listings caught his eye: lobster tail and beer, $40.
"Damn," he said. "My three favourite things! And for such a reasonable price"

(this ones from personal experience

)

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"

lklovelykiki24 · 6th November 2007, 01:51 PM

Lol I like the last one hehehehehe

Good jokes

**Adri** · 6th November 2007, 03:28 PM

lol nice!

buddy lee · 6th November 2007, 04:04 PM

**kingtony** · 6th November 2007, 04:06 PM

well i miht have been teetering the line a little but i liked them so here you are

6th November 2007, 10:57 AM	#1
kingtony How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? Join Date: Jan 2007 Shard: alantic Posts: 2,648 Gold: 194 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post	some funny jokes and yes there clean A strict teacher was lecturing his students on the importance of being wide awake. "I've found the most effective way to start a day," he said, "is to take a cold shower. Then I feel rosy all over." A bored voice from the back of the class interjected, "Tell us more about Rosie." A man noticed his co-worker wearing an earring. "I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff," he said. "It's just an earring," the co-worker replied. "How long have you been wearing it?" the man asked. "Well," his co-worker replied, "ever since my wife found it in our bed." Q: Why are women like pianos? A: If they're not upright, they're grand Q: Why are women like pianos? A: If they're not upright, they're grand An elderly couple was attending a church service. About halfway through the sermon, the old lady leaned over and said "I just let out a silent fart. What do you think I should do?" Her husband replied, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid." A redneck came to the big city to visit some friends. They went to an Applebee's restaurant for dinner and one of the listings caught his eye: lobster tail and beer, $40. "Damn," he said. "My three favourite things! And for such a reasonable price" (this ones from personal experience ) On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, "My picture?" He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever". She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now." At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture". He beams and asks why and she answers, "So I can get it enlarged!" For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.

6th November 2007, 01:51 PM	#2
lklovelykiki24 Join Date: Dec 2006 Shard: Lake Superior Posts: 694 Gold: 2,475 My Mood: Thanks: 22 Thanked 11 Times in 6 Posts	Re: some funny jokes and yes there clean Lol I like the last one hehehehehe Good jokes

6th November 2007, 03:28 PM	#3
Adri Wearing metal panties in a lightning storm Join Date: May 2004 Shard: Pacific/Landroval Posts: 3,851 Gold: 920 My Mood: Thanks: 210 Thanked 117 Times in 84 Posts Awards Showcase Total Awards: 2	Re: some funny jokes and yes there clean lol nice! We are all broken and wounded in this world. Some choose to grow strong at the broken places. --Harold J. Duarte-Bernhardt

6th November 2007, 04:04 PM	#4
buddy lee Agent Zero Join Date: Oct 2006 Shard: Atlantic Posts: 2,055 Gold: 17,753 Thanks: 24 Thanked 29 Times in 27 Posts	Re: some funny jokes and yes there clean nice

6th November 2007, 04:06 PM	#5
kingtony How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? Join Date: Jan 2007 Shard: alantic Posts: 2,648 Gold: 194 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post	Re: some funny jokes and yes there clean well i miht have been teetering the line a little but i liked them so here you are For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.

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