Adri's story had me rolling! "You DO realize you're getting beat down by a hairdresser, right?" LOL!!!

I think my funniest moment was when me and a friend I met in-game decided to "prostitute" ourselves for 100gp. This was when I first played, back before Tram, so we stood at West Brit Fel spamming, "SELLING MY BODY FOR 100GP!" Then, when we got a taker, we'd take the person to a room in the Inn in East Brit. Usually the guy would be like, "Ok, there's no one around, so are we gonna cyber now?" And then he'd give us the 100gp and we would run and hide somewhere. We'd sometimes make 1k a day.

Kylana

Memory I have that makes me laugh was my friend lou he got the game 2 weeks ahead of me nov 98 didn’t realize the importance of a good name. So he names his first char after his car Miata and proceeds to log into Britt for the first time in his life. I’m standing in the room behind him and after about 20 mins he decides to brave the new world and leave town he gets the message you have left the protection of the guards. One screen out of town he comes accost 5 players hanging out and one immediately yells HEY CHECK OUT MIATA that was it. All 5 ran up to him they disarmed them selves and proceeded to beat him to death with their bare hands. They didn’t even loot him did it for the pleasure. He deleted the char the following week and I was hooked on the game bought a copy my next day off work.

Perhaps better still was when we joined UO archery was king and in case you weren’t playing back then ill do my best to fill you in. You could have several arrows in a steam in the air at once and they would chase you around corners of houses. So Lou was on his new char Khan and he’s walking through the woods this is long before tram and sees a guy standing there trying to make a heavy crossbow the guy is blue. So he fails to make the heavy crossbow and Lou sees this message some 5-6 times then he sees the message that he had succeeded in making the heavy. Guy yells out FOOOOOOL and proceeds to kill khan in 2 shots. Kids today in my day even the tradesmen would kill ya LOL

It didn't happen to me but I was watching as my sister met "Ratboy". Ratboy lived in the guardtower along the Yew/Brit road.

You see my sister was/is a bit naive.... when she first started playing she was told by a friend not to leave town without him. Oh yeah..tough guy... he of the three GMs. Well, Yew isn't the largest or most exciting town, and when he finally invited her to join up with a couple of guildmates and go hunting she jumped at the chance. Did I tell you that our dial up connection was usually 14.4??? I guess you can see what happened.... she got left behind and ran into this "guy". He was all dressed up like a huge rat (totally cool how people can do that with their characters she was telling me).... and then suddenly for no reason whatsoever he attacked her. Killed her, even! She followed him home because he had looted her too. All the time this was going on she was screaming at the comp... screaming at ICQ... screaming at me (and I was an innocent bystander mind you). Her friend came back and found her finally... then he killed the ratman and gave her back all her stuff. To this day she gets all indignant if you mention "Ratboy".

Setting Traps for the pk and dread lord players with one player carrying a rune marked home. he would go to the X-roads to get killed, of course the rune would be to the guard tower by the heartland ( in those days there were guards there)
We all would be waiting for him to land in the tower to be guard killed. Such a satisfied feeling :

One of my guildmates years ago, played an Orc. He walked into town and bought an Ostard from a Tamer that had several...problems with the communication of course. I was laughing so hard.

Then when he go off of it and tried to feed it, the Ostard turned tail and ran.
He wound up killing the bird and walked back into town to buy another one.

There is so many things this is one funny thing. Being a murder had a char named Cookeu "The Dreaded Lord Cookeu Grandmaster Cook" guys would come up and say really what can a cook do? I then would cast explosion, and flamestrike they would just die, if more I would do metior. Then I would loot there bodys and place books there showing A recipe book with many things inside apples, and others things, but the main ingredent was the persons name that I had just killed

This won't be funny to anyone but me, but I have cats named Maverick and Goose IRL. Years ago, in-game, I got 2 cats and named them Maverick and Goose. I was hanging out at my house with my then-boyfriend, and suddenly in the game, the one cat lunges at my boyfriend and the text, "Goose lunges!" appeared over the cat's head.

I got a screenshot and we laughed our arses off for weeks! I recently tried to find the screenshot. No luck I had kept it for years. (This story happened in 98-99/ish).