source taken from UO Europa

Recently there was a post made here on the Europa forums, by a player who hadnt played UO in a very long time. They were seeking some kind of guidance as they were totally lost in the new game.

My guild and I generously adopted this person, provided them with the groundwork to be able to hunt useful creatures in todays game and basically made it playable. I would estimate that between all the armor, items and insurance money this player received close to 15 mil worth of items for free. Stitchers mittens here, Pendant there, these items add up fast.

Now some will argue that you dont need certain items to compete, but being realistic, she was given armor that had 100% lrc, avg of about 45/50s' resists, some casting, little bit of LMC, basically whatever was on the pieces we put together, spellbook, pets (was a tamer). She was by no means instantly given an UBER char, but just enough that she could attend peerless with the guild and start to make her own money to get by. And she did do well, earned herself some nice items etc.

Funny thing though, all she ever did was complain about the guild and everyone in it, every single day there were "issues" with someone daring to do a hunt on their own, or someone not instantly answering her msgs etc. This was a group who welcomed her and aided her, yet all she did was whine and moan.

Many people tried to explain to her, that it was a group, and not everyone always wants to do the same thing, hunt with the same person etc, and thats ok. But to her it was some horrible life and death situation for which she continually threatened to leave the guild if we didnt fix. It came to a point where she did quit and we said fine leave, because !!! we dont need that sort of behaviour.

I guess my whole point is really why bother?? Whats the point in gathering friends to help someone who has come back, when it so often turns out to be that the person themselves is not genuine. How do you justify spending money and helping a player out, when they really are just a greedy ignorant kid :/



Whats everyone's opinion here ?

"Give someone a fish, they eat for a day, teach them to fish they wont go hungry"

I hate to say, let them fend for themselves. Point them in the right direction and see if they make the right choices on their own.

When you help new(er) players you really put your neck on the line.

I have to agree though that if you give them too much, they can become ungrateful. When you have nice armor and weapons handed to you to be taken to hunts that will help you much more than average means, they might not grasp how hard someone else worked in game to give them a nice item.

For me - GM made armor (non runic), a runebook with a couple key runes and a horse. I am willing to answer any questions and give out my IM for rez calls - but I don't have the means myself to go handing the moon over. They should try to earn it themselves.

I am proud to say that a few young folks I helped I am still in contact with and one just recently contacted me. All are doing very well in game - better than myself LOL In fact, I'm going to be decorating the castle of one of my young player helps

I am the kind of person who gives and gives, and it always bites me in the butt. BUT I never learn. I meet someone who is interested in trying a new playstyle, and pvping. So I take em to my house, help swap some armor out so they can get suited up, give them a new weapon or 2. (I frequently burn gold hammers on weaps for community grab bag in my house, as well as burn barbed kits and the stuff I dont use, is free for friends and guildies to have) Then there is the rare case, I would say 1 in 5 that dont work out, but they always come back to me and say "you know bo, eventhough I am not in your guild anymore, and am in an enemy guild, 'we're cool' you helped me out, you sat and sparred with me for hours, helped my armor/weaps/jewels out and just took the time to help, I respect that" That is what makes me feel good at the end of the day. I dont give out millions, I dont give out arties, but I give out my goods that I dont use, yet still VERY good stuff, just not Doom stuff, or pendants/stitchers. Its just the part of me that remembers when I started out, I had nothing to get me going, and I earned everything I have on my own, and want to help out those that need a hand.....

I agree. I have brought a number of people into the game and I have never handed them the keys to my vault.

I do the same thing every time
1) What character do you want to play? fighter, mage, tamer, etc..
2) Explain to them about that template and what skills they will need to work on.
3) Make sure they have the basic starting equipment. Then off to the hunt!
4) If they are fresh out of the box I will actually go around with them and let them fight all I do is heal them. That way they can improve their skills and learn the mechanics of the game.
5) As they get stronger I will walk them to tougher areas. and yes I walk them so they will know were it is. once there I will mark a rune if they want.
6) Once they are strong enough to run around on their own I make sure they have my contact info and turn em loose.

Everybody I have done this for have done very well and still play the game. I think they stay with UO because they earned everything they have.

Personally I think that if you don't believe the good in people, then humanity as a whole is doomed. By being kind and generous to others, and leading them with this example, hopefully that will rub off on them. It may not be obvious at first, but it does usually stay with people. Most individuals just need some time to grow up themselves, then they'll come to realize what has been done for them(hopefully), and return the favor to someone else. I'm sure when we were all noobs at one point or another, someone took the time to help us out, and thus we do the same for others. Sometimes you get that bad apple, but that's how life goes. You don't give up on something because of a few failures, if that were the case nothing would ever get accomplished, in UO, life, and everything in general.

All you can do is be responsible for your own actions. Your group went out of it's way to help, your groups actions are not dimninished because of insensitivity or rudeness on the recievers part.
Keep doing what your doing...it's just the right thing.

Se'an

Well said. I think we've all had similar experiences along the way. I know I have. But you just have to know you did the right thing, and go on.

Not to get into a discussion about HOW to help people but to answer the question, "why bother?" Because, in the end, it comes down to two things.

#1 Are you happy with the person YOU are? Can you sleep at night? Have you lived up to YOUR personal values?

#2 What goes around comes around, good and bad. One day karma is gonna bite you in the butt or kiss you on the cheek. Everyone needs someone sometimes and the way you've treated others in the past determines a lot about the way you'll be treated in the future. Not in a scorekeeping kind of way but just in a basic values kind of way.

Just keep being who you are and know that it's all about you being able to face yourself each day. We can't make other people be who we want them to be. We can only be who we are and remain true to ourselves. That's why bother. Just my opinion.

The things is, even though it can be rare to have it happen, once in a while you find out that you have started someone on the path to doing great things for the community as a whole. It's one thing to help out someone that is going to stick around for a month. It's an entirely different thing to help someone out and find later that they are doing very well and helping others when they can. At least, this line of thinking is why I bother.

I have to agree with a stance of helping out the people, but not just handing them top of the line equipment. That is something that must be earned, like friendship and trust. By all means, continue to help those who need it, or seem to, but not handing out things like Stitchers Mittens, etc. The Guild I was in when I first joined was good that way. (LS 8*V) They helped me gain the stats I needed, helped me get decent armor and befriended me, but didn't expect me to be there at every event, nor did I expect them to baby sit and entertain me. If the player wants to learn and gain, the hand up will do it.. Hand UP, not Hand OUT.

Agreed with what many said above, rather than just dishing out stuff, dish out information. It's much better to let folks earn their own way up the game, what you can do is answer their questions and point them in the right direction - or even go adventure along with them.

Okay sure, some basic armor to get started etc is no problem but setting someone up with all they need before they even learn to play just makes a player with no knowledge, no appreciation and no actual game experience.

I've been lucky enough to actually meet some new players who flat out refused to take any stuff from me as they wanted to make it on their own. So I just helped them understand game mechanics and off they went, and sure enough they all did keep playing (and still do as far as I know) and did well for themselves.