Tabbitha

27th

Today's Edition is Brought to you Big Betty Badoodle

There have been strange goings on in the Postes offices.

I called by earlier to drop off news of the change to the tavern night,and the place was deserted
Now I know some one had been there cos the mail bag was tossed on the floor but no letters to be seen anywhere.

If anyone knows the where abouts of our missing Reporters,( yes a few have gone missing) and/ or any readers letters please contact me ,Betty Badoodle,so we can at least keep bringing you all the latest dirt.........I mean NEWS !!!!!!!!

LONG LIVE THE POSTE

In the meantime note that UMBRA TAVERN is TONIGHT

( they changed it backto wednesday,but did they tell me ? Oh no ....even after complaining loudly,no one posted it on the right night)

SOOOOO

heres the one news item tonight folks



TONIGHT

Yes folks its Umbra Tavern Night again.

Darts Nealoth style,blood freshly squeezed and brain lovingly prepared for the discerning palate.

To find out more,come along and have a thirst quenching time.


Friday

Tarot at Midnight

Learn of fate and fortune.
Readings of the Tarot will be performed by Alraune Kestrel
at Midnight (GMT) on Friday, June 30th at the Keg and Anchor tavern, Trinsic.

Fees to be set by the patron.

__________________

Tabbitha

Today's Poste 29th is brought to you by Gretcha Gossip


That's right folks, after a horrid time nursing an injury, the one and only Gretcha Gossip is back to bring you the gossip behind the news! What was my injury I hear you cry? Well I can't go into detail, but let's just say I discovered some 'jaw-breaking' news, which for reasons I won't publish, will not be printed in this or any future issue of mine. Though I can finally speak to do interviews and the such, I'm still in pain, so get well cards, and gold can be sent to the poste!


Mysterious men meet Cove
Here come the men in blue..?

Yet again we have reports of mysterious men clad in blue uniforms appearing in the most unexpected of places.
Today a group of five individuals were spotted observing a brief skirmish between Covian and Loyalist forces in the Eastern district of Trinsic, itself.
Here they exchanged remarks, pertaining to the state of the rebellion, before moving swiftly away from the scene. Soon after they headed in the direction of Cove, requesting an audience with Captain Arkay once they arrived. Arkay arrived promptly and after a short discussion two of the men followed the Covian Captain inside.
Hours later they emerged, grins spread openly across their faces.
What possible reason could they have for meeting with the authorities of Cove?
Has an alliance been struck? Has an agreement been brokered?
While information is sketchy, one of the men was overhead mentioning 'newly acquired territory', to an associate.
What could this mean?


Covian Cowardace!
Skirmish in Trinsic leaves Arkay licking wounds

Now, I love a man in uniform as much as the next warm blooded female, nothing gets my heart racing as much as seeing a whole line of them! So yesterday I thought my luck was in, Trinsic was full of them! From the guys in green, the yellowish sash of the Yewmen, ruby red of the Duchy, and the clash of colours from Cove! Though the events that followed were far from this reporters dreams! Blood, guts and gore! Thats right folks, battle did commence!
From what I gather the Covians were passing through Trinsic making a delivery at the docks, and evidentally the Yew folk caught sight of them and followed them through. I only question what Cove were doing with a caravan in Trinsic? and just why were the Yew folk 'passing through'. My thoughts are the Yewish have Covian spys! Regardless of the vast numbers Cove had, and the apparent support of the Kaldorians, Cove simply fell short in performance. The Duchy guards tried furiously to break up the battle, but from experience, nothing stops a Yewman until the job is done! Cove were defeated and quickly fled from Trinsic, Yew departed shortly after, not wishing to deal with the mess they'd caused, so as always the Duchy were left to pick up the pieces! Come on you lot, you want to fight? Do it on your own land and clean up the mess!


The dead don't die!
Swaggers rightful owner returned - unharmed!
Despite rumours on the death of the famed Anna Boon our reports tell us Miss Anna wasn't killed at sea! Alive and absolutely glowing, Miss Boon graced Swaggers Inn with her presence earlier this week. Will she be pleased with the changes at the inn, or will the staff have to wear clothes again? This isn't the first time Miss Anna has been feared dead, so I went to find the gossip! Could it be Miss Boon has a secret child somewhere she pops off to visit? Could it be she really was killed and is an imposter? Or quite simply the living dead? No dear readers! The truth is much more sinister, twisted and oh so devious! Miss Boon has an entire secret life! She is infact the wife of a Mister Spoon, and here at the poste we thought Heath was her only one!
The information came from a young lass, who will remain anonymous, but I can say she also claims to be the daughter of the Spoons! Squeaky clean Swaggers, is less than squeaky and definately not that clean! Either way, we're glad to see Miss Spoon, Boon or Heath returned, and saddened at the thought one eyed Kiran is no longer running the show. Though I look forward to finding out more of her now; not so secret second life!


Letters to the Editor

Seems a jealous poste editor has stolen all of my fan mail, because I just know someone must of written something.. No? Well get those quills squiggling!
Our mailbox remains empty, no love letters this week, not even hate mail! Come on readers let us know someone picks up the poste! Tell us anything, any news is new worthy! Who do you have that crush on? Tell someone where to shove it! Anything!
Don't forget we also print advertisements. In need of a cleaner? We'll find one for you! In need of staff, or to advertise a party? Let us know!!
We cannot do this without you!
-Gretcha Gossip

__________________

Tabbitha

2nd July



Fight on Trinsic docks
Yewish guards gone mad.

Royal Marksmen, Yewish Guards and Britiania Guards marched to Trinsic only nights ago to stop a Covian caravan from returning to its destination. The caravan was apparently transporting leather armour made by an unknown tailor who lives within Trinsic.
And not only that, days after the attack on the poor unaware caravan party Coves docks were blown up by people unknown, most suspect it was Yewish!



Letters
Dear Poste,

Regardless of whether Trinsic really has turned traitor to the crown by assisting the covians rebels, Trinsic town is still widely regarded as a loyalist town. Hearing that rebels were stocking up on arms the true loyalists marched to Trinsic in a bid to stop them returning the items to Cove and prolonging the brigand raids that harass the loyalist troops and the good people of Vesper under the pretence of liberating them from their liberators.

The loyalist troops, that is the Yewish Militia, The Brittanian Guard and the Royal Marksmen entered Trinsic through the southern gate, unarmed, and without any kind of trouble whatsoever made their way to Trinsic docks where the covians were believed to be. Finding them just finishing loading their cargo onto their ship the men immediately armed up, and in a swift hail of bolts and a single explosive hurled upon the deck of the ship the fight was over.

All the while this was going on, the Duchys own guardsmen stood idley by, watching, not attempting to either lend aid nor calm the situation and the kaldorians were nowhere to been seen until the last covian had been struck down. The first we saw of the kaldorians was a blonde haired soldier attacking a member of the Yewish militia. As with any normal human being, we couldn't have stood by and watched our colleague be hacked down without lending aid, so the kaldorian was shot down. Immediately disarming the loyalists marched from Trinsic so as to avoid any further unnecessary confrontation. If indeed there was any training going on (which there didn't seem to be) then it wasn't our intention to interupt, but the rebels would hardly have rearranged their schedule to a more appropriate time. Though I might suggestion rescheduling the training for another time, it appears some officers are incapable of keeping their men in line, and the men need tot hink before attacking a large group of well trained and well armed soldiers.

Yours,
Sergeant Leo Madsen
Line Company
Yew Militia

[Leo you bring tears to my eyes, really you do couldn't have said it better myself. HOWEVER why is it that you decide to harass the local news paper with your letters instead of sending them straight to the duke? Really darling, you need to think next time. - PP*]


Letters to the Editor

Dear Poste,

Regarding Ms Gossip's report on the skirmish in Trinsic last night, I thought I should clear up a couple of points.
Firstly, Cove signed a peace treaty with the Duchy of Trinsic earlier in June and are permitted to conduct trade in Trinsic.
Secondly, the Guardsmen Militia of Yew were also offered a peace treaty by Trinsic but, to my knowledge, have not yet signed.
However, neither faction are permitted to bear arms in Trinsic, so had no business fighting there.
Furthermore, the soldiers of Kaldor (who were about to start a training session with the Duchy guards) were not aiding Cove but attempting to restore order. Regrettably, the hot-headed fools of Yew saw fit to batter one of my men unconscious before departing.
I doubt they will be welcome in Trinsic again any time soon.

Regards

Cdr. Soulshadow
Army of Kaldor




Dear Poste,

I would urge those who have encountered Breed before to stop by the Jail, and demand that the creature is incarcerated there until Sunday evening, when I can take action against it.

Breed has been involved in the following incidents in the past:

Quote:

- The distress of Lucy Lastic (spreading vile rumours)
- Kidnap and torture of Callum Fitzhugh
- Insidious mind control powers, used on unwilling subjects (including several Guards and even the Duke


I am preparing a way to... ensure that Breed harms no one again, but I must implore as many citizens as possible to petition the Duchy NOT to release that being on Saturday night!

Signed,

Muldran Skully

[Duke do NOT release breed on saturday night, really, I wish to keep my head - PP*]

__________________

Tabbitha

Bang up to date !!!

heres this mornings copy of Sosaria's most red rag or is that READ rag ? *grins*





Loyalists are Lovely!
And they shall remain so for as long as my pretty head rests on my shoulders…

After a bizarre and confusing turn of events, it has quite unpredictably been revealed that the King’s forces are just as nice (if not, nicer!) than the Rebel hordes. After a kind word with Lord Klion, I myself was inspired to take the King’s Oath, so now if I write nasty things about them they can legally have little me bumped off. How adorably cute!

And how rotten the rebels have been to them! A prisoner held in their cells (very comfortable, and I should know) became dissatisfied with the service offered, and proceded to break loose, butchering poor trainees who were, as is believed, learning how to walk at the time. As if that wasn’t enough, the orphanage was lately seen in flames. Denying any possibility of playing with matches, the young children (now stationed in the abbey, apparently under the watchful eye of monks and holy deities, of course) point the finger of blame at Covian bandits. Well no wonder the guardsmen are in such a royal strop!

Speaking with the brave defenders of Stonekeep myself, I found them to a charming sort. Though some have a tendency to pat my posterior while I’m not looking, one of them drew his rather hefty-looking mace and asked that I touch it. Despite the fact that I had to turn the poor little man down just this once (I can’t say I’m into chains, spikes and things), he – along with all his delightful guardsmen buddies – was simply charming. Anyone who hasn’t seriously though about siding with the Loyalists and their King (Who remains invisible to the common eye) should jolly-well get their boots on and meet the merry folk of Stonekeep. It’s well worth a visit, and if you’re lucky, you might even get to keep your head! The basket is of course optional.



Terror Grips Cove!
Bad news for rebel scum!

Sauntering up to Cove to meet with the ridiculously handsome lads that graced my presence last time, I became utterly shocked at the complete desolation of the town that, until becoming plagued with anti-Loyalist nonsense, was such a chirpy and happy place to be.

It immediately became clear to me that something was up as one of the ex-glamour guardians of Cove told me a story of woe – he had stubbed his toe! It wasn’t long before the whole story came out and it was revealed that one of his most trusted comrades also broke a nail. Well, bother! How can they even hope to ‘rebel’ against the fearsome hunks of Yew with such catastrophic and devastating injuries? Despite desperate talk that their ‘fearless’ Dragoons could defeat the Loyalist incursion with nails or without, it was all too apparent that this was merely the frantic babbling of madmen.

It was eventually heard, after the men had stop talking about manicures, that Loyalist Waywatchers were able to breach the walls of Cove and go about targeting dangerous members of the civilian population. After completing this task they ran off, full of glee, as watching Covian Dragoons decided to give chase, eventually. One would think the Covians, in this desperate time of need, would do something other than throw grand parties and festivals, but apparently this has not occurred to love-struck Captain Arkay, whose romantic idiocy is compromising the life and wellbeing of those under his command. In my expert journalistic opinion, he needs a jolly good spanking. Mela?



Kaldor gets Clobbered!
Greenskirted thugs outsmarted by clever Britannia Guards

Reports have been coming in of a confrontation that occurred between two Britannian Guards surrounded by warmongering blood-thirsty Kaldorians, outside the normally peaceful tavern, the Trinsic Rose. It is claimed that the greenskirts bluffed by throwing slander and insults at the poised blueskirts for a long time, before finally backup arrived in the form of more boys-in-blue. Esmeralda, the Britannian Guard Sergeant, was seen instigating the fight at last, striking an astute blow at the pub-brawling Cal Soulshadow, knocking her into a passing giant serpent, which, inspired by the sheer bravado of Loyalist peacemaking, joined in the attack against the Commander. Raising her blade to deal with the serpent, though, she was met with a sharp blow to the back, as Esmeralda took advantage of the situation and gave her what-for!

The details of the ensuing battle are hazy, but it is understood that the great Sergeant was eventually taken down by the action of devious underhanded Kaldorian tactics. We at the Poste (Well, certainly me, anyway!) hope that she makes a speedy recovery, so that she can beat the lingering Kaldorians back to their wretched home of Gorimdor for good!






Rumours


The infamous ‘love triangle’ between Kaldorian Foxy, Pierre and Kade has finally been resolved. No, quite unexpectedly, Kade and Pierre are not the lucky couple we had all expected – Foxy has finally opted for Kade, who, perhaps for this reason, has been seen back in the daylight after spending a long time alone in the dark not talking to any mortals. Saying nothing about their ‘unforgettable’ night together, we are left to doubt, then, if Pierre truly is the “big guy” we’ve all imagined.


Captain Arkay, groom-to-be, was seen in the Swaggers’ last night with a lady of the night. A stag party between just the two of them? How sweet!


And in the paradise of Stonekeep, love is in the air as we hear rumours of a ‘hushed-up’ romance between a young Waywatcher and a footman imminently becoming public! Yes, the two are reported to have been talking about marriage, although how anyone could fathom that from a deviously scrupulous Waywatcher is a mystery. Who knows what’s been going on in the shadows…

The final rumour has been hastily scribbled, perhaps after the Poste has been printed

It seems that His Grace Irvyn has been spending the city coffers on things other than armour repairs for his weary paladin escorts. We can only speculate whether he's just being tight-fisted or if his Geisha's specialist services have deprived him of his wealth!




Letters to the Editor

[Letters? To me? You have to be joking - H.H.]





Whats on?


Tonight Wedding of Erik Arkay and Mela Don’t miss out on Cove’s social event of the year. Meet at Cove Barracks before 8pm for transport to the event site

Tomorrow: Flo’s Fancy Dress Party 9pm, Moonglow

Friday The Trinsic Rose Open

Saturday: Jhelom Town Market 20:30 BST till late. Stools 50gp, tourney entry fee 500gp

__________________

Tabbitha

Today's Poste is brought to you by Gretcha Gossip

Important Announcement!

Citizens of Trinsic beware!

Several Dozen Wild Beasts have escaped from their Illegal imprisonment at the Bartholamew Estate near the Britain/Trinsic Border.

These Animals are VERY dangerous, please ensure all windows and doors are kept securely shut at night and inform the nearest authority of any strange sightings.

As a precaution ALL wild beasts entering the city of Trinsic not accompanied by a handler WILL BE PUT DOWN.

Any Persons with information regarding the Illegal, capture, imprisonment and experimentation of animals at the hands of the Bartholamews should contact the Trinsic Guards as soon as possible.

Trinsic thanks you for your co-operation.

(Well if the guards handling of criminals and drow is anything to go by, the wild, dangerous animals will be issued with citizenship and free to go where they please, rather than being put down - Gretcha)


Pint sized terror stalks Trinsic!

Treacherous Trinsicans Troubled by Tiny Tear-a-way

It's been said many a time the people of Trinsic and it's guards are in no position to aid the Loyalist battle for Minoc and the days of late have seen proof.
Troubled orphan Claire has long been a pain for the people of Trinsic and of late the trouble caused by this rebel has increased.
In the recent days she has been seen to not only pick pockets, and use various ways to steal hard earnt belongings, but cast magical spells. Most disturbing about this, is the Kaldorians seem to condemn the guards for actually trying to prevent this child from doing any more damage.
What has Sosaria come to when a guard can't punish a criminal? Regardless of age? Since when did the Trinsican Guards listen to a word the Kaldorians said? And why, oh why.. are supposed Loyalist Trinsicans harbouring known rebel aiders? The only thing I am sure of, is this is just a prime example of why Trinsic need to start craking down on rebellious actions. The children of today are tomorrows leaders!


Traitors Farewell

Yewish deserter gets what he deserves!

Yesterday eve saw a final goodbye to a desperately missed Covian. Templi squire Roland Dagorian led the service and felt it important to remind people of Hrothgars long and productive life, not only was this man an ex-Captain, he founded the Grenadiers, and was a faithful church follower. Clearly the Templi had not known of his former desertion of the Yewish Militia, and since when was aiding Covians and their rebellious actions in anyway productive?
Grenadier Corporal Hrothgar was not only a traitor to the King, he was a bully and a brute. Once rumoured for cutting off a finger from a recruit who had called him old, this man is everything I despise about Covians, and I'm not the only one to feel this way. Veldrin Ni'harel stepped up to say a few words calling Hrothgar "Idiotic and ugly", well I'm glad someone had the bravery to say what everyone else was thinking.
The Corporal found mysteriously murdered on Coves docks is finally where he should be, six foot under with a pile of dirt on top.

Mourning relative retaliates

Two deaths for the price of one

In sadder news, Murad of the Knights Hospitaller was burried earlier this week, though his funeral went in a less than peaceful manner. After his loyal nature to the Knights, and the shocking suicide truth behind his untimely demise, one would of thought this man would deserve a slightly more heroic send off.
Father Merlwick announced that Murad had been a man of 'high stature' but 'he died in shame' and more shockingly that he will 'perish the sinner he was in LIFE'.. Understandably a distant relative of his was more than upset at such a comment, and saw fit to lunge at the un-suspecting Father, fighting for his relatives honor no doubt!
In even more shocking news Murads family will have to bid farewell to another relative as Lord Heath threw a series of spells at the mourning man - heard to be called James. James quickly fell to the floor where he remained as no more than a charred corpse.
The Vesper Militia obviously not caring for the poor Father nearly killed, and ordered the Priest arrested!
Clearly the Vesperians follow more any rule they see fit, than that set by a church.


Letters to the Editor

Our mailbox remains empty, no love letters this week, not even hate mail! Come on readers let us know someone picks up the poste! Tell us anything, any news is new worthy! Who do you have that crush on? Tell someone where to shove it! Anything!
Don't forget we also print advertisements. In need of a cleaner? We'll find one for you! In need of staff, or to advertise a party? Let us know!!
We cannot do this without you!
-Gretcha Gossip


Adverts !

Missing!

Looking for the wife of Richard Santos. She has gone missing from Minoc since the battle the other day.

Lisa Santos has brown hair and brown eyes. She is slightly thin and has tanned skin. Anyone that see's her tell her that her husband has fled to Trinsic and is staying in the guard barracks there.



Free!

House-trained cats and dogs given away free to any pet-loving person who can take care of them. Horses (choice of colour) and wolf-hounds can also be provided to order for a nominal fee.
Place an order with Moll Sinders either posted at Ye Olde Poste Office, Trinsic, or by pigeon to 322791984.

Note: the Frettings - Jern and family, Smaed and Agnes - are away on holiday 13th to 16th September inclusive.

Adventure!

Can't seem to make enough crown for the King's Taxmen?

Are your dreams being spoiled by the daily toils of life?

Do you need to find the pot that resides in each and every one of us?

Then follow the torches from the Britain Moongate!

'Cecul says nu' more!'

__________________

Tabbitha

Inferno at the Poste!
Poste offices gutted by mystery blaze

A fierce blaze swept through the Poste’s Trinsic offices last week, destroying our presses and completely decimating our archives. Fortunately no one has been hurt, although Miss Skeeter’s favourite handbag was a casualty (every cloud has a silver lining! The thing was hideous!)
The fire is thought to have started last Saturday night, but the cause is still unknown. Arson has not been ruled out. Could it be an insurance job? A disgruntled reader? Or did some clumsy tinker knock over a candle?
Builders have been in all week and we’ve finally got our delicate hands on a new printing press, so it’s business as usual for your favourite newspaper.
Apologies for the inconvenience, and thanks for your patience, lovely readers.


VanQa Kidnapped
Crazed drow makes off with our beloved tavernkeeper

VanQa, she of the silver hair and golden tonsils, has been snatched from the Rose by her stalker, crazed drow Iglata Slyannen.
A small group of VanQa’s friends, including VanQa’s rumoured beau, Devante Stirling and his Marksmen, dishy paladin Pierre Vikor of Trinsic, and injured Kaldor Commander Cal Soulshadow, tracked the drow to a hideout outside Umbra. However, the portcullis was locked and the drow refused to come out to play. He was seen disappearing through a moongate with several henchmen, all dressed in black. VanQa was not seen, and many now fear for her safety.
According to her sister, Cenire, Iglata’s unhealthy attachment to VanQa is due to that old chestnut, unrequited love. An adopted orphan, Iglata was raised alongside VanQa’s grandmother, and the young drow fell deeply in love with her. Unfortunately, she grew to love and marry another, leaving Iglata insane with jealousy. Since he could not have her, he decided that noone could, and placed a terrible, fatal curse on her that aged her thousands of years in a matter of seconds.
Unluckily for VanQa, she so closely resembles her grandmother that Iglata believes her to be a reincarnation, and her friends and family fear that history will repeat itself.
VanQa’s husband, Miguen, has been missing for some time, and VanQa was recently upset to receive a box of his bloodstained clothes, and two severed ears, from Iglata.
Let us hope that this madman is caught before he can harm her further!





Rumours

Sally Buttons was spotted outside Trinsic with her very good friend, Ivan the cook. Of course, coy Mrs Buttons was quick to deny that anything improper had occurred between herself and Ivan, because she was married. When it was pointed out that her married status did not deter her from having a brief fling with Kaldorian, Arinar De Aviram, Mrs Buttons blushed scarlet and burst into tears. But of course!

Fabulously butch Kaldor Commander Cal Soulshadow has returned to the Kaldorian homeland of Gorimdor in the hope that surgeons can repair her shattered shoulder. The commander was injured during recent clashes between loyalists and rebels up in Minoc, but what first appeared to be a simple fracture is now in danger of becoming a career-ending injury.
Accompanied by hulking hunk Kai, she boarded a ship early this morning, leaving Captain Talon to keep an eye on the army. No pun intended!

Talking of Kai, the big man was seeing enjoying a jug or seven of cider in the Keg and Anchor last night. Kai, who usually only touches water, seemed to take a liking to the evil brew and was later seen being guided towards the gate by his commander, looking very much the worse for wear. Let’s just hope it’s not a rough crossing, eh?



What’s on?

TONIGHT:

Haven Horse Race, Haven Docks, 19.00

TOMORROW:

The Trinsic Rose is open for business, Trinsic Moongate, from 19.00




Letters

The Poste is ready for business again, so please get writing!

__________________

Tabbitha

HOTT off the pressess

Rebels Rampage!
Allies or foes? Nobodys knows!
The rebels, clearly not satisfied with opposing the King took to fighting one another yesterday. Trinsics streets were filled with rebels (Loyalist town indeed!), armed to the teeth with weapons and insults!

Tensions ran high last night between the crooked Kaldorians ad the cowardly Covians, begging the question, just how strong is their alliance?
The Trinsicans stood baffled as fighting roared through their town, people of all ages grabbing a weapon and fighting one another. The Covians claiming Kaldorians were traitors, stupid, and a whole list of insults, and the Kaldorians not taking time to argue back, grabbing weapons and defending their name.

The first casualty however was that of a mere civillian, later I discovered why. The man, a worker at Swaggers Inn, after finding his way back to his feet, and nursing some wounds, was heard to shout
"Swaggers will be a Loyalist ONLY tavern!".
Seems even the citizens of Vesper are beginning to see sense and turn against the rebels.

My sister also sent me this statement from Cove;
''Jus tryin' ter get a drink I wos. Sat in der tavern dere, and dis bunch o' Kaldorians stormed in shoutin' all sorts! 'Em Covians wern't ter happy. 'Em were even sayin' they wos finally goin' ter get ter take some sort o' revenge on 'em Kaldorian scum. I wos shocked, I ain't never fort people cud beh so rude''.
Seems the trouble spread further than just Trinsic, right into the heart of the rebels.
Call it a day and join the right side! Long live the King!


Haven Heroics!
Loyalists storm towards an ill-fate at the hands of rebellious Haven!
From your correspondent in unfashionable places

Last night the quiet of our island was disturbed by the invasion of something more threatening than the customary incursions of mongbats and horde minions.

There seemed to be several waves of troubles, which may or may not be connected.

A pile of bodies littered the streets near the forge, and the militia were nowhere to be seen. A little while later, some seriously injured members of General Darkion's troops limped back into the town, having repelled some invaders from Jhelon, it seems.

The general and his troops took some time in the town square recovering from their injuries, and explained how the Jhelomites had tried to attack the island in two waves: however it is a long way from Jhelom by sea, and those invading troops must have been either seasick or suffering from nightshade poisoning. In any case, they never reached the town, or rather village.

Later, however, a band of ruffians in black robes ran wild in the town, causing serious injury and consternation.

Haven is no longer simply unfashionable, but also lawless, and I will be submitting my claim for an increase in salary to cover compensation for mental anguish.


Rebels move on Yew!
Blood shed and tears
Sunday saw yet more blood fill the lands of Britainnia as rebels took to sotrming more of the Kings land. Marching through Yew as if they owned it, the rebels stormed undeserving Loyalists. While the battle began, healers from all over Sosaria set up a field hospital ready to tend to those wounded.

The battle seemed to be over fairly quickly, the rebels being forced form Stonekeep by a vareity of Loyalists. Though, as they settled back into routine, a handful of men in green returned whispering something to the Captain. I've never seen the men arm themselves so fast.. they armed up and charged, so bravely, towards the field hospital. The rebels had been gathering up again, and the Loyalists were determined to rid them from their land. After what seemed an endless battle, the rebels just kept coming, and soon, unfortunately over powered the Loyalists. Loyalists of Sosaria, don't be discouraged! We -will- beat the rebels if we stick together! Hail the King!


What’s On?

Tonight:

The Trinsic Rose Repair Hour 7PM - 8PM

Tomorrow:

Not a sausage, well that I've been invited to anyway! If you're holding an event, a party, a secret meeting even! Let us at the poste know.

Friday:

The Trinsic Rose 7PM-10PM


Rumours

Duke Irvyn seems to of disappeared, last week he ventured off to Spiritwood and hasn't been seen since. Has Lady Caroline finally sent him insane and he's done a runner? She has been heard nagging him more than usual lately, or could it be something to do with the disappearance of Miss Seriya DeLacey? All I know is, something's amiss! Answers on a post-card please.

Swaggers Inn is rumoured to now be a Loyalist only tavern! Where will the rebels go? Does anyone even care? We need to rid Sosaria of more rebel locations! Good on you Swaggers!


Letters to the Editor

Dere miss
i think tis verry bad that you writ that thing abaht me in the paper. I has always bin a good and vurchuous girl and ent never done nothink improppar, to make me usband sham'd of me.
Ivan as bin me fiend fer many a yeare sinse we was bothe fiftene and first come ter Trinsic. As fer that other fellowe, well there warnt nothink goin on bertwene us, he were kind to me and bort me dinner a cuple of tymes.
I loves me usband verry dearley and wuld nevar giv him eny corse ter dowt me.
so ye may kepe yer nastey insni..*crossed out*....insinarn..*crossed out*.......words wat ent true to yerself, and dunt be ritin sich turrible lyes about pore foke wat carnt asnwer bak.
yr obidiant sarvant
S. Buttons (Mrs)



CaLuum uv SHaduw-Cort, Asteri WatChes.
Lat hab woRdens dat she wAhnts
Preper fur uZ, Sahgorim
(Well, I couldn't make sense of it.. but being the kind, caring person I am, I've put it in anyway - GG)

__________________

Tabbitha

source taken from F4g



Covians Uncovered!
The shocking truth behind the Battle of Stonekeep.

Just when the horrible Rebel hordes are feasting (probably on each other) and celebrating about an apparent Victory in Stonekeep, we cunning Poste types have discovered their devious little ploy. According to done Mr Firelance, Besieger of the glorious Guardsmen Militia, the Covian rabble chose to hide amongst ‘neutral’ healers during the Yewish charge, causing our brave boys to lose track and falter.

How noble our trusty tinmen are! Just when you think they couldn’t get any sweeter, the turn around and give you a bunch of tulips. Metaphorically, of course.

Mr Firelance went on to claim that the Guardsmen, and indeed, the entire loyalist force, would never stoop to such acts of cowardliness, and that they’d ‘Fight to the last man standing.’ Good gosh - How very brave and perhaps a little sexist of him! He added, ‘Conquest through fire and steel!’ which I assumed to be some sort of battle cry, although exactly why he roared the words at little me, armed with only my quivering little quill, I can hardly imagine.


[A guest story coming up, along with a bit of reporting by yours truly! – H.H.]


Disaster Strikes Trinsic
Duke Irvyn Middlethorn Kidnapped

Confirmation that the Duke has been kidnapped: on Tuesday a note was found left in the jail apparently demanding a ransom, rumoured to be 10 million gold. Sergeants Kaelyn and Orson went off to Spiritwood to investigate but didn’t find anything. However, last night Guardsman John found another ransom note. It was hard to read, being written in something only approximating normal Britannian, but with help from Countess Gwyn (not just a pretty face .. or whatever), it was deciphered. The Countess then went off to the crossroads near Britain with Guardsman John, Guardswoman Natalie, and an old man called Hearon who just happened to be passing at the time. Alas, no Duke was forthcoming, but a number of things were established: the kidnapper is a woman, referred to as a witch, and is extremely dangerous. So much so that the go-between committed suicide rather than report his failure to obtain the ransom. The trail led on to Serpents Hold, but still no Duke, only a strange series of fluttering fairies in the fire dungeon, mysterious mushrooms sprouting in various places, and a torn up book of tales about shipwrecks found in the inn. However, from various bits and pieces of information cleverly put together (let’s hope they got it right and aren’t just away with the fairies), it seems the optimum time to try and retrieve the lost Duke will be this Friday, and will involve a dangerous sea voyage.

Being the intrepid reporter I am, I sought to interrogate the public about the Duke’s sudden disappearance. - H.H.]

“I am concerned with the absence of the Duke as it forments instability. The Duke’s presence provides more stability than most would realise.” – Imrae

“It's definitely terrible, but whoever is to blame for it will be caught, I have no doubt about that. I'm sure things in Trinsic will try and continue on without him… I blame the rebels.” - Retired Guard Tanya

“Somebuduh ‘ulse kidnapped Dukuh in distruss? Oh nuh! Cecul alwuhs wuntud tuh buh ‘us Prince Charmun’…” – Some idiot with a box of hats.


Orcish Migration
Are we ever safe?

There have been recent reports that bands of greenskins have been sighted around the outskirts of Trinsic. Though as of yet it is unclear where they came from, I am nevertheless trembling in my furry little boots. With so many stories of their rampaging warmongering tendencies and disgusting personal hygine, they’re practically Kaldorian maul knights!

However, some extremely biased evidence in the form of tribal marking suggests that the beastly creatures may have originated from Yew. Well, I never! You would think that such foul fiends would quickly be put to an end by the brave resident Guardsmen, but alas, they appear to have spread. Who’s going to deal with them, then? Well, guards and militias around Sosaria appear to be too caught up in fighting one another to care about the problem as it stands, and we are in perilous lack of young heroes who are into dragon bashing, orc slaying and that sort of thing. Sigh!


Captain Talon: In Profile
A peek into the life of a Kaldorian Cyclops…

Strolling into the Keg and Anchor late at night can be a terrifying ordeal. All around, all manners of creatures are throwing ale bottles around, shouting, jeering, and having deep philosophical conversations about the state of Sosaria today.

Last night though, stooped over an ale was Captain Talon of the Kaldorian army. A lesser woman would of course have just dropped her jaw and run away screaming, but I am proud to tell all of you that, after I did this, I strolled back in casually and gave him an offer he couldn’t refuse. It was, of course, a game of chess.

Knowing that you can instantly tell everything about someone by the way they nudge their pawns, I was full of anxious excitement as I slipped out my notebook and started anticipating all manner of hidden truths he might divulge. However, I was a little perplexed. Of course, the game went as predicted – he brutishly killed off all my pieces one by one until declaring a barbaric checkmate, Kaldorian style. The man behind the board though, was quiet and reserved. Not saying much about anything, he talked a little bitterly of days gone by and how everything was better ‘back in the day.’ Furthermore, he expressed great interest in writing, particularly of the sort I was doing. Could it be the great Kaldorian bully has been subdued enough to consider poetry, needlework and flower arranging as an alternative to being beaten across the face and jabbed in the eye? I have wondered how the lack of morale affects the soldiers, but for once in this sorry bloody campaign, I nearly felt sorry for the winking Captain. I do hope the Loyalists won’t be too hard on him once this campaign is through.




Letters to the Editor


Dear Poste,

Regarding your story on Covians and Kaldorians in Trinsic last night, I can verify that, whilst one or two of them were genuined, a good number of them were imposters, trying to stir up trouble.
I recognised one of the "Covians" as Leo Madsen, a Sergeant in the Guardsmen Militia. A couple of the others also looked suspiciously familiar.
I made the Trinsic guards aware of this fact but not, unfortunately, before one of the imposters struck me and rendered me unconscious.
A true Kaldorian will always bear the maker's mark of a Kaldorian crafter on their armour. These imposters wore armour that was unmarked. If in doubt, check the armour for its authenticity.

Regards

Harry Donnerstag
Kaldor Viper
Army of Kalor




Announcements

The lady at Haven Market who ordered and pre-paid me for a valorite war-fork. Its ready for you to collect, of exceptional quality. You can find me in The Trinsic Rose at 7-8 pm Friday, or leave a message in the post box there for me.

Jern Fretting



What's On?

Mondays and Fridays:

The Trinsic Rose 7PM-10PM

__________________

Tabbitha

source taken from F4g [ remember you have to register to view the pics ]

Peace treaty
A story by Gretcha Gossip

The shock announcement that the Loyalist alliance had requested peace talks with the Republic of Vesper sparked a great deal of rumours and gossip as to where the talks would take place, after receiving a reliable tip I ventured to Moonglow.
After a short while both parties arrived, the Vesperians armed to the teeth and flanked by numerous visible and hidden bodyguards, with the Loyalists apparently hopeful of a peaceful resolution, unarmed and friendly.

The negotiations stuttered from the start, with Vesper throwing jibes at the Loyalist commanders, who in turn brushed them off and struggled valiantly to put the talks back on course.
Still, the Vesperians focused on laying down ridiculous demands as the talks wore on, as if buying time until their Covian allies could arrive, which they soon did.
Numerous Covian soldiers marched into Moonglow flinging insults at the Loyalists, before throwing tables, chairs and even shubbery aside, damaging property of the people of Moonglow.

Throughout the ordeal the Loyalists maintained their stance of desiring peace but the rebels continued to ravage the meeting place, with Hanse Davion even going so far as to lie to the Covians in order to save his own skin.
Nils Twothumb appealed to the Covians for a continuation to the peace-talks and was promptly assaulted before being led off to the Covian dungeons.

It would seem that Cove care little for the freedom of all peoples, instead they are motivated by greed and the lust for power, exerting their authority over their Vesperian lackeys as and when they feel the need.

The Vesperian leaders departed shortly after the arrest of Twothumb, although Hanse Davion remained behind, showing little concern for Nils, Tabbitha or even his own men.
It was then that Davion revealed what he had been up to the entire time, sitting down to talk to the Loyalist commanders in an effort to continue the peace-talks, his earlier refusal clearly a ruse for the benefit of the Covians, soon after both parties departed to continue talks in secret.

Below are a few sketches made of the evening;


Rumours

Tsugi a blind barmaid in Cove seems to latch onto everything with a pulse, I guess loosing your eye sight makes you clingy or perhaps shes not really blind and is using it to try pull in the hunky Covian men?
And also has anyone else noticed Covian moods of late? They have been switching from angry to sad with the click of a finger, does it have something to do with these gems they are searching for? Who knows..



Letters



(Whatever you say Davion darling, whatever you say - PP*)


Adverts




Whats on?

University Night: Actual happenings in Sosaria and the defeat of the Void

__________________

Tabbitha

source taken from F4g [ remember you have to register to view the pics ]


Duke Rescued!
(but probably needs it all over again...)

Darlings, the Poste press room smells like terrible, terrible singed bits here and there, but fortuantely no one seems worse for wear. However, your darling reporter has been able to collect herself enough to find out that the adorable Duke Irvyn was rescued by a cadre of clever, clever guards (including the devilishly sexy Lance Williams).

The poor old Middlethorne had sailed (or been sailed) out to a shipwreck just near the mysterious Serpent Pillars, and had found himself washed up on an ancient shipwreck there. Guarded by sea serpents, he just couldn't bring himself to swim 500 miles back to shore - all that work behind the desk obviously doesn't do wonders for the swimming muscles. According to the words of people who saw him brought back, though, the seaweed and raw fish diet looks like it's going to be all the rage; that little paunch he was developing (yes dear, you were) has completely gone. Your friendly reporter was speaking to the rather fit Sheriff of Trinsic the other day - perhaps the Duke's disappearance and diet was formed by a little professional jealousy? Hmmm?

The Duke's absence didn't stop him obtaining a large amount of written information (probably very wet drivel) which is currently on display in the Duchy records office. Scholars are yet to be clamouring to get access to the paperwork, probably due to the fact that one can smell it from the far side of Trinsic.

As a wonderful little coda (that will terrify even the most stranded man) it appears that Countess Gwyn "I'm only in it for the honey" Quaintly has rushed to the Duke's rescue, sweeping him away to an undisclosed location to help with his recovery. Best of luck, Duke Irvyn. Your darling reporter will be sure to send out the search parties later today!


Bad for your Elf?
Dreadful pun pervades serious story

Your equal opportunities reporter isn't one of those racialist people, and feels a need to point out when enough is enough... While travelling through the wilds of Yew (on an errand to hand in some wonderful fabric, don't you know) your excited reporter found herself watching the hideous scene playing out. A young elvish man was hiding, wimpering, inside one of the houses on the outskirts of Yew town. He told me that he had been attacked, and whipped to an inch of his life after he had found himself lost in the woods, after travelling through the Heartwood gate.

He had then been set up by four men, who proceeded to beat the merry hell out of him. As your compassionate reporter was talking to him, an angry mob passed by outside, lead by a brute with a nice face, but dreadful breath. Fortunately, your heartfelt reporter managed to hide the poor elf, and has spirited him away to a save location within Trinsic. The poor lad wants to head back to Yew, but is in a dreadful state.

A warning, then - your crusading reporter will be defending elves from those aggressors - no matter how cute they are. The aggressors, not the elves.


Local Round-up
Spiritwood

A traveller in Spiritwood was alarmed late on Friday evening by what he claims was a daemon on the roof of the University. The man, who only gave his name as Drew, said:
"It was bellowing and howling something chronic, could hear it from miles off. Thought it had escaped from the hedge maze at first, but it was a big grey thing, not red like the ones there, and it was stuck on the roof of the old University building. It looked over the edge at me a few times but it didn't show any signs of jumping on me, which they usually do."
One wonders what this means and whether this is the simple and obvious explanation of why the old Chancellor is missing.


Adverts & Notices




Letters to the Editor

No letters today - but thank you for the notices and adverts. Remember to let us know all your requirements! The Poste is your paper!



Whats on?

Tonight - Sunday - 8pm - Umbra University
Tonight's topic: Defeat of the Void Shadow
A discussion about the heroic victory over the Void Shadow, and a trip to the location the creature vacated - as well as a round up of current events.
Gates will be provided - from several locations, including Umbra Moongate

Monday for beer and cheer at the Trinsic Rose!

Thursday 5th October - 8pm - Cove Town Centre
Cove Relaxation evening - including a storytelling contest.

Know of anything else happening? Let the Poste announce it to all and sundry! Or Monday, or Tuesday!

__________________

Tabbitha

Umbra University

Again it was time for the Drama to unfold in splendid majesty. Amongst the assembled throng were Edmund Fairholm and the Lady Ravida. Those denizens of darkness the Shadow Court were there in large numbers as were crowd pleasers Cerys and Ultimor Slowtree.

The night seemed to focus around Callum and a strange set of theories he has linking Saktoths gate at Nohkmar with the Void Shadow the current lack of Virtue in our lands and Jordan Jurell. It seems the Nohkmar Gate was a place watched by the Council and that Jordan “Goldielocks” Jurell himself claims the Void Shadow chamber is not “of Sosaria”.

Callum kept mentioning an ante-chamber much to the delight of Cerys and Ultimor who didn’t realise ants had their own chambers.

More sense was spoken by Lady Ravida – a witness to the Void Shadows destruction who retold of her findings related to the rifts. It seems to this author she concurred somewhat with mad Callum’s theory slightly. I would hope Ravida can send her thoughts to us in a cohesive sense as I would hate to misquote her here…

Muldran Skull just seemed to gasp a lot. Court Jester Roxanne of Vesper asked salient questions but this author had lost interest by this point.

Sources tell me the Shadow Court will be making a field trip to this Void Chamber tomorrow night – to perform more of their unspeakable rituals? Beware …

A Note Found…

Walking late along the paths around Trinsic this author did no less than discover a small piece of paper which caught his eye. It seemed to smell of rose perfume which in itself was unusual. It was lodged in the brickwork of a ruined house not far from a cemetery near Trinsic. There were signs of fresh earth scattered around, and feeling myself stalked by a strange robed figure I did make my way by haste away before reading of it.

The text is repeated here for your delectation:

“Darkness has returned, and I have come with it. Or have I? I have no body, I lost my soul a long time ago … The child! My child. It must come to Her. Beyond the Black Gate ... Do what I ask, for I am Venom and She is your Queen. I command you! Bring Her the child!”

More History!

It seems Drax Drodun – once of the Lost Lands Lighthouse has been seen around Trinsic and he is carrying papers and clutching them to his chest. Sources reveal he is “acting like a madman” and talking of the Void and Dreamers and NuJelm and Black Rock.

Perhaps this is more of a conspiracy than we originally thought.

Orcs!

Civilians be wary, your fearless reporter can exclusively reveal that a new Orc Fort has been built to the north of Vesper. Although we cannot confirm if it in fact is home to a band of Orcs, we have noticed the increased amount of strange figures walking arou